Java4eveR

Kick This!

FIFA World Cup 2010!

The World Cup is underway! At last! Check back here for the latest commentary on your favorite teams that you will most certainly not find anywhere else!

As for me, I am currently rooting for my team Spain to take it all the way!

Viva España!

Sweet Street Justice

Monitos

Google TV

The Future of Television, brought to you by Google

Beware the Sys Admin!

www.xkcd.com/705

Amazing Photographs

Take a look at this amazing album compiled by Jonathan Griffiths. These are some of the most brilliant images i have seen in quite some time. Let me know what you all think.

Jonathan Griffiths

Greatest Rickshaw Ever!

Metal Gear Solid: Philanthropy Trailer 2

June Trip(Also, what i spend my time with at work)

Baba Shahab's Guide to a Healthy Life

Baba Shahab's Guide to a Healthy Life

Hmmm.. dude like i have done a lot lot lot and lots of research ranging from studying the life style of all these communities, that live over a 100 and also studying the buddhist shaloin monks  well.. see its a simple rule

1) Dont over feed...we tend to push our stomach too much because of the taste
 

2) They say we must leave meat, but i say thats not possible... so just try to reduce it everyday, everysingle day have servings of fruit and vegetables

*Shabby Tip* To start with, try sub way, next time instead of a sandwich, tell them to make you a salad instead with OLIVE OIL, no freakin... honey mustard and stuff.
 

3) Gotta get those 8 glasses of water.

*Shabby Thought Process* Think of it like this, there is so much poison inside you, if you dont get it out, it will turn cancerous, so how do you do that? First by drinking in lots of water, water goes in, mixes in with the dangerou stuff and goes out through your fun stuff and next, ever heard of colon or gut cancer??

Thats because 20% of our food never leaves the body and stay in there and decays so how do we rid of that?
 

4) FIBER!!!!!!!! FIBER CANNOT BE DIGESTED, IT GOES IN, GRABS WHAT EVER IT CAN AND GOES OUT BASICALLY ITS LIKE A CLEANING AGENT. WHERE TO GET THAT...3-4 BANANAS SHOULD BE A GOOD START

*Shabby Philosophy* WE ALWAYS CLEAN OURSLEVES FROM THE INSIDE, BUT NEVER INSIDE YOU GOTTA START DOING THAT

*Shabby Tip*NEXT TIME YOU FEEL HUNGRY FOR A SNACK, TAKE A BANANA OR TWO

*Shabby Question* DID YOU KNOW THAT 2 BANANAS ARE ENOUGH FOR A 90 MINUTE WORKOUT??

*Shabby Answer* WELL NOW YOU DO

*Shabby Thought* VERY POWERFUL ITEMS, AN ATHLETES MIRACLE POWER, IT WILL GIVE YOU AN EXCELLENT BOWEL

*Shabby Tip* NEXT TIME NOTICE THE SIZE AND IMAGINE YOU WERE HOLDING ALL THAT CRAP INSIDE YOU AND CARRYING IT AROUND YOU, GET RID OF IT.
 

5) AND ONE THING I CANT STRESS MORE, FLOSS...

*Shabby Tip*YOU WANT TO LIVE, THE ANWSER IS DENTAL HYGINE...

*Shabby Science* THE BACTERIA IN YOUR MOUTH WILL SOON END IN YOUR STOMACH AND START A WORLD WAR, YOU GOTTA REDUCE THAT.
 

6) TRY TO INCORPORATE MORE OF THAT OLIVE OIL IN EVERYTHING YOU EAT.
 

7) AND REMEMBER ONE THING "HAVE BREAKFAST LIKE A KING, LUNCH LIKE A PRINCE AND DINNER LIKE A BEGGER".
 

8) BUT THATS NOT ALL, YOUR SLEEP SHOULD BE BETWEEN 6 - 8 HOURS

*Shabby Fact* IF YOU DO THAT YOU ADD 8 YEARS TO YOUR LIFE.
 

9) KEEP YOUR BRAIN ACTIVE BY DOING SOMETHING MENTALLY STRENOUS, LIKE CHESS, SUDOKU, ANYTHING.

*Shabby Science* EVERYTIME YOU DO THAT, REMEMBER THE ARMS OF THE DENTRITE TURN INTO THE BACK BONE OF THE DENTRITE, WHICH JUST MEANS YOU HAVE MORE BRAIN CELLS

*Shabby Tip* AND ANOTHER GOOD SOURCE FOR DOING THAT IS BANANAS, AND ALMONDS BOTH HAVE POTASSIUM WHICH SHAPE YOUR BRAIN.
 

10) AND THEN THERE IS THIS ONE ADVICE I DONT KNOW WHY I AM GIVING, BUT HAVE LOTS OF SEX!

 

*Shabby Philosophy* The key is moderation in everything.

How a gun works(inner workings)

Ehhh a little to the left

The most honest nigerian scammer

World Cup Letter

Past meets present

Check out this photographers amazing concept of taking historic photographs from St.Petersburg and blending them into pictures from present day.


Click Here for Awesomeness!

So this is what spiderman does when hes not saving NYC

Someone Finally Got that Biyatch!

My helmet for the next bike i buy

Android Now Running On iPhone 3G

Android Now Running On iPhone 3G

Posted using ShareThis

You could have been doing this Salman

http://green.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/05/04/banking-on-fuel-sweating-flora/

iPad is still getting tons of Grief!

The A-team(now in fun size)

What an IT person would do

Given someone is trying to teach us our job.

Acapella Bad Romance

Check this out!

how i feel in the summer

World Cup 2010

For those of you that know us, and by that (i mean those of you that follow this blog. Which is pretty much the contributors who know each other anyway) You know that we are big football fanatics. Yes, i said football (Why is the post titled world cup then?) Because "soccer" is actually called football everywhere in the world but here you fuck. So accept it and move on. And being the football fanatics that we are we have integrated a world cup countdown into our blog. Also, here is an interesting piece regarding the teams that could be potential disappointments during this world cup. If you watch football, and understand it, i would suggest you take a look at this. You might be very surprised(I was, and still am) If you don't watch football, then you should probably read up on it because it is a sport that is a lot of fun to watch.

http://soccernet.espn.go.com/world-cup/story/_/page/worldcup101-04102010/ce/us/which-team-disappoint?cc=5901&ver=us

God of War

This is for everyone who said that God of War 3 was to be the savior for PS3. Yahtzee disagrees. In your face!

The Humbling Truth

Sorry for not having updated the site in a while, to jump-start our engines, here's some food for thought:

Indian Women Love Paki Men

It's true, read the following article and tell me I am wrong.

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life/relationships/man-woman/Theres-something-about-Paki-men/articleshow/5766332.cms

My Current Favorite Song

what cowboy bebop and afro samurai are afraid of- Busta rhymes

MC Rai Irish Arabic mixes-Will kick your fucking ass!

Free music - Essaif

"My Purpose" (at least on this blog)

So initially when this blog was started it was meant to be an avenue in which Imran can rant about his dealings with Salman and his competency in the IT Consulting workforce (or lack thereof, according to Imran). However when Salman joined the coalition here I was requested to join and give my two cents about IT (which I do not have even have any where near two cents to contribute) or hookah.

However, this first post of mine will be dealing with something that has been bothering me for quite some time. People nowadays refuse to see a greater power beyond our capacity to understand. I am, of course, referring to God. I have been dealing with people about how they are Agnostic/Atheist but spiritual, or do not believe in God because their significant other left them, their parents are unfair to them because the parents actually trying to raise and nurture them properly, do not believe in organized religion, and so on and so forth. It is frustrating to me to hear some of the things I hear from mentoring cohort that their friends (in high school) do not practice any faith for the aforementioned reasons/excuses. People take God for granted, especially teenagers in this society we live in.

It is frustrating to me to see and hear about this because I begin to wonder what have these youngsters experienced in their 15 or 16 years of existence to make them not believe in a higher presence? What have they seen? Just because we all face things in our lives that negatively impact us does not mean that God does not exist or love us. In the Qur'an God says, "Verily with difficulty there is ease." Why do people not see the light at the end of the tunnel? Why do they lose hope so easily? As a Muslim, I believe that losing hope is a sin. It is taught to people of my faith never to lose hope, because God will always answer our prayers, even though it may not be right away. Not to sound cliche, but patience truly is a virtue. The whole point of patience is for us to NOT wait for a long time, but for the RIGHT time. When that time comes for us to not wait any longer, the wisdom and knowledge behind this wait will be revealed and all things will become clearer. As a result of teenagers losing faith and hope in their lives they are put on anti-depressants. There is a "chemical imbalance" that is making them feel this way. What is truly making them this way is lack of discipline and faith.

I am always telling the teenagers I mentor to not lose faith in yourselves, in your friends and family, and most importantly do not lose faith in God. God says,"Take one step towards me and I take two towards you, start walking to me and I shall run to you." He is making it easy for us to approach him. We just need the motivation and dedication to stay on that path, whatever it may be. He also says that, "I place a burden on my servant that he/she can bear. And I do it so that they may become closer to me." Let's face it, we all turn to God when we want that A on a test, for a girl to say "Yes" when a guy asks her out, or any other hardship we may face on a daily basis or just once in our lives. Winston Churchill once said, "There are no atheists in the fox holes." There is this innate feeling or yearning for humans to believe in something greater when we are in absolute desperation. We all know that feeling, even if it was to get an A on a test. We always compromise or strike a deal with God. "God if you do this for me, I will do this for you." Yet, once we get what we asked for, for the most part, we do not carry out our end of the deal. I, myself fall into this category too. Then when something bad or horrible happens we begin to complain to God or just even refuse to recognize his existence.

We really need to let go of whatever it is that is holding us back from believing in Him and realize that he loves us and has ALWAYS been there for us. We just refuse to see him.

The reason why I put the title of this post in quotations is because I intend to use my posting abilities for whatever it is I want to talk about. I may not post regularly, because this blog is meant for Imran and Salman's dealings with the IT world, but every now and then I may post something regarding religion, society/social problems, hookah, food, and a variety of other things as well.

I am sorry for the rant, but I had to let it out and explain my sentiments towards the matter. Hopefully we can all begin to NOT take God for granted and seek his guidance in all matters of life, myself included.

Oh no, Wednesday is here at last.

Look, no one likes coming into work, especially so early. What can you do?

You can do many things, why not try looking at the bright side? I rode the train to work this morning, saw a lot of pretty girls, which is always nice, not that I am a creep and make a move. Whilst listening to Gorillaz Radio on Pandora, I love me some Pandora, and once I stepped off of the train at my final destination, I felt a swift cool breeze wash over me. This in itself makes today amazing, I am in the city I love, the weather is great, the people are wonderful. Yup, this is awesome.

I am also considering the end of work today, I hope to have business concluded by no later than 3pm today, so I can head home, work out, eat and then get ready to hit up the gun range. That's right, instead of going on a killing rampage at work, I am gonna bust a cap in a safe and controlled environment known as Maxon. Woooop!

Happy Hunting!

Must have accessory for the Ipad!

You Think Imran's Day is Awesome?

For those of you who think IT is easy work and simply "Glorified Tech Support", you're right.

Except for those days where when everything is sailing smoothly and you suddenly hit an endangered whale and end up killing the last of its kind.

This my friends, we call a disaster.

Not only have you killed a rare and precious creature, you have also angered all those that were trying to safeguard it from the delicate imbalances of the world. You asshole.

That's when they turned on me. Here I am sitting in my corner, I have a corner in one of my offices, not a real office, just some space where they thought they should throw the computer equipment along with the their computer guy, me. My corner begins to shrink as faculty members crowd around me complaining about the network being down, not blaming me for it being down, but blaming me for it not being back up. Golly!

Power failures galore! The network seemed to have gone down after the entire building witnessed the occasional power outage over the weekend. Typically all is fine and dandy once the power is back up, but not this time. I went computer to computer reinstalling network drivers and this did in fact fix the issue, but when I came in the following morning I heard reports of no network connectivity. Sheisse.

After three days of toiling and isolating the issue, I finally found out that one of the grad students fucked up. Someone had plugged both ends of the same ethernet cable into a switch located in the grad students restricted research room.

I mentioned this to the professor of the grad students and she was trying to tell me I was wrong for thinking that the network went down because of this... really?

Now that the crisis is indeed over, I can get back to the crap load of work that piled up while I was fixing the network.

I am not complaining so much as I am sharing, IT work is great, but there are some situations where you'd rather be playing hookie.

Hookie sounds like hookah... weird...

Damn! It's only Tuesday

Although IT is perceived to be something really spectacular and obscure(because people don't really understand computers)it requires a lot of repetitive tasks. Such as, showing dumbasses how to power on their monitors and explain to them that you cant really talk into your mouse. For those of you that think that IT is cool(and by this i mean, the authors, and our whopping ONE follower)let me provide you with an example of what my day is really like.

6:00 a.m.- This is the time i normally wake up(this is the time my jobless friends are going to sleep after smoking shisha all night-motherfuckers)

7:15 a.m- I eat my breakfast as the rest of the city is completely empty(because no one is dumb enough to wake up this early for oatmeal)

8:00 a.m- I am on the train to work (this is the saddest part of my day, and walking into the CTA is similar to the scene in Nosferatu where the vampire snuck up on that little white kid. You don't ever expect it, and you know something ridiculous is going to happen)

8:15 a.m- The train gets busier and up until 8:45 or so i sit in my seat, with some random dude pointing his crotch in my face smiling. And a little part of me dies. Everyday. But i let it slide because this is probably the happiest he's been in a long time. Gandu

9:00 a.m- I sit at my desk till 5 p.m. talking to random people and thinking about what i'm going to do after work.

On the plus side, i have decided what shisha flavor i will hopefully be smoking tonight. Raspberry Lemon Mint. Gotta look forward to the little things.

The Misadventures of an IT Consultant... or Two.

Here is a little info about the contributors of this blog.

Name: Imran Noormohamed

"I'm a PC"

Title: IT Professional

DOB: September 9, 1984

Years Experience: Since the umbilical cord was cut.
Clan: Memon

Points: 2,999.5 CSP*

Name: Salman Malik

"I'm a Mac"

Title: Research Programmer

DOB: July 10, 1987

Years Experience: -10
Clan: Punjabi

Points: 1.5 CSP*


The ongoing battle between Jedi Master and Padawan, one reluctant to learn things the easy way, the other reluctant to teach things the easy way. This is by far just a learning experience for the both of us, but, a little competition never hurt NO BODY.


Hence, we introduce the point system. A completely arbitrary system that recognizes the challenges overcome by both consultants. Who's cuisine will reign supreme?!

*CSP = Computer Shumputer Points


~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~


We also have an ever expanding contributor list:


Name: Kashan Malik

"I'm a Hookah"

Title: Big Brother
DOB: September 13, 1986
Year Experience: Negligible
Clan: Punjabi
Points: 1,000,000,000 CSP

Salmans amazing ability to describe people

This morning, as i sat down at my desk with my usual shitty coffee and that weird feeling in the back of my head that consistently reminded me that humans should not be working at strangely early hours for long periods of time. I happened upon a conversation with Salman. As per usual, the conversation went something like this.

Me: "whats up"
Salman: (insert random comment here)
Me: "Awesome"
Me: "The party last night was great, what were those girls names who the party was thrown for?"
Salman: (tells me their names)
Me: "what did they look like, gandu?"
Salman: "5'3, dark skinned, south indian"

And thus, in a thirty minute conversation Salman was able to sucessfully describe to me, EVERY woman in the South Asian sub-continent. Thanks Salmannuuhhh.